Wednesday, 23 May 2018

Should I Get Married? I Ask The Internet!*

*This is a sponsored post*

“Should I get married” is a question I continually face and – at some points- have been pressured to answer. And the older I get the more common the query is.

It was only a day ago when I saw an extremely popular local wedding venue – the Hythe Imperial Hotel in Kent, UK – were advertising their wedding packages on Facebook and I realised, I’m even being pressured into considering marriage due to my online demographic footprint. Hence, why I started looking into marriage and started drafting this article.

As a caveat, I feel like I should say I’m a 28-old man and I’m lucky enough to have a stable job and a girlfriend I think the world of; a description that ticks most boxes of a man who should consider dropping to his knee. However, I am also a sucker for a stereotype and with the millennial badge firmly placed on my chest I did what a generation is continually doing; Googling (other search engines are available). The question Googled being: “Should I get married”. 

I thought I’d detail the three best responses and advice below:

You’ve survived tough and turbulent times

Reading the Hello Giggles blog and their inference that life is like a rollercoaster (no Ronan Keating references please) could not be more on point.

There will be tough times and there will be tears, fighting and awkward discussions but if you haven’t experienced these times yet how do you know you can get through these times? I’m not saying you artificially create these situations as a ‘test’ for marriage but it is something you need to consider.

You're prepared to make an ongoing effort to keep the magic alive.

The Insider mentioned that relationships are considered hard [work] and of course this is true. Most of us have been in a relationship where that “magic” has died because it became too much like work.

The advice the Insider gave was: you know you’re ready for marriage when the hard work becomes a labour of love.

Communication, Goals, and Values

Finally, something which resonated with me the most is a point I found on ‘the spruce’.

Yes, to some its common sense that if you’re with the right person the you will have same goals and values in life but, how many times have you heard the saying: “opposites attract”.

The saying itself infers it may not be so common to have the same goals and values. Having different likes and different opinions is okay as long as the two of you agree to disagree.

If you’re to take the big step and tie the knot, surely you should be to communicate and understand the goals and values your better half has. Even if that contradicts your ideas/ideologies etc.

Final thoughts

Obviously, if we’re going to be candid, we’re not all the one for our other half (and they may not be the one for you). The pressure of eternity together and insult into injury, planning a wedding (especially if it’s a big one) can cause a lot of undue pressure and stress if the couple is not on the same page. But that’s a different query… and something which may be answered by the article… “When It's Time to Let a Relationship Go”.

No, this mini piece of research hasn’t enlightened me anymore but incidentally, it has illustrated this question is a popular one (below I’ve included a graph to show the popularity of the search term over the last 14 years) – for both sexes.

That anxiety I am feeling is more likely than not being reflected by my better half – so I’m going to put down the mouse, turn off Google and have myself a chat. Fingers crossed!

Have you asked Google if you should get married?

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